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Crush, by Jane Futcher
Free PDF Crush, by Jane Futcher
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In 1964, Jinx is afraid to share her secret, has no one to turn to, and is terrified of her own feelings. She lives on shaky ground as she attempts to protect herself, Lexie and their relationship from the prying eyes of other students and school authorities. She learns that having a crush on another girl can be exhilarating… and terrifying.
- Sales Rank: #1687116 in eBooks
- Published on: 2015-03-27
- Released on: 2015-03-27
- Format: Kindle eBook
Review
"The emotional facts of this novel ring true. Jane Futcher has tried to present the confusing, terrifying dilemmas that accompany any step out of the narrow band of acceptable behavior that society tolerates." Dorothy Allison, author of Bastard Out of Carolina, in New York Native
"At last I've read a good book on a serious subject for a young adult that wasn't written by Judy Blume! In fact, I read the whole book thinking it was for me, an older adult, before I found out from the jacket it was really meant for my 11-year-old-but-mature-for-her-age daughter. Jane Futcher may be a first novelist but she's obviously a solid writer if she can produce a story that's interesting to both of us." Lynn Rogers, Noe Valley Voice
"The characterization is outstanding; the hurt, bewildered Jinx; her loyal roommate; and the smooth, calculating headmaster. Lexie is a superb portrait of a fascinating but unreliable and dangerous personality." The Horn Book magazine
"A good ear for dialogue and a good eye for a scene and a good memory for the sickening incomprehensions of adolescence." --Helen Vendler, professor, author and literary critic for the New York Review of Books, in a letter to the author
"Crush deals directly with the confusion and naïveté that first love and the blossoming of sexual feelings bring out in teenagers." --Bay Windows
From the Author
I was born on February 27, 1947, in St. Louis, Missouri, and grew up in Baltimore, Maryland. My first paid writing job was creating live, multi-media high school assembly programs for Rick Trow Productions in Philadelphia. In 1973 I moved to New York City to work at Harper & Row, Publishers, Inc., where I produced multi-media programs for school audiences. San Francisco was my next stop. There, I wrote Crush on a Hermes typewriter at an oak table by my window on Webster Street. Little, Brown and Company, published Crush in 1981. That same year, Holt, Rinehart and Winston published Marin: The Place, The People, a profile of Marin County, California, with photography by Robert Conover. From 1983 to 1995, I worked as a massage therapist, English teacher and freelance journalist, writing mostly for Plexus, the San Francisco Chronicle and The Slant, a Marin County LGBT newspaper that I helped launch and edit. In 1991, Avon Books published my second novel, Promise Not to Tell, a story about an unhappy teen-aged boy who helps a friend in desperate trouble, creating more trouble along the way but learning a lot about kindness, friendship and the criminal justice system. I joined the staff of the Marin Independent Journal in 1995, working first as an editorial writer and later a reporter. In 1997, Alyson Publications published Dream Lover, a novel about the improbable affair of two former school friends who fall in love as middle-aged women. My life took an unexpected turn in 1999, when my partner and I bought one hundred and sixty acres in the mountains of northern Mendocino County. We moved there permanently in 2004, leaving the suburbs behind and learning to love rattlesnakes, bears, coyotes, marijuana growers and each other. Women Gone Wild, released by Women Gone Wild Press in 2012, is the true story of our adventure. I'm very pleased to be publishing this new edition of Crush, with an introduction by author and psychotherapist Dr. Marny Hall. Crush was one of the first novels of our time to go inside the mind of an adolescent girl in the sexual thrall of another girl. Caught in an endless loop of expectation, shame and self-recrimination, Jinx Tuckwell ricochets between what society expects of her and her fear of losing her heart's desire. To say "no" to the seductive, passionate and unpredictable Lexie Yves becomes tantamount to denying the profound feelings that both trouble and excite Jinx. She can no more refuse Lexie that than she can flip off the stern and punitive headmaster who discovers their secret. So, enough about me. I'd love to know something about you and how you happened to read Crush. You can find me at janefutcher.com.
From the Back Cover
CRUSHbyJane FutcherA classic lesbian novel with a new introduction by Dr. Marny Hall, author of The Lavender Couch and The Lesbian Love Companion.***It wasn't easy fitting in at an exclusive girls' boarding school like Huntington Hill. But in her senior year, Jinx finally felt like she belonged. Lexie--beautiful, popular Lexie--wanted her for a friend. Just being near her new friend made Jinx feel dizzy and wonderful.Jinx knew she had a big crush on Lexie, and that she had to do something to make it go away. But Lexie had other plans--and Lexie always got her way.***"Jane Futcher has tried to present the confusing, terrifying dilemmas that accompany any step out of the narrow band of acceptable behavior that society tolerates. The emotional facts of this novel ring true. One of the best." Dorothy Allison, author of Bastard Out of Carolina, from New York Native."A wonderful lesbian romance, rich with developing sexuality and attraction with the ins and outs, true pain and joys of adolescent love. I wish I had read it in high school." Carol Seajay, founder of Old Wives Tales Books and Feminist Bookstore News."Absolutely wonderful--compelling, humane, sometimes funny, sometimes sad, beautifully written, and wise." Anne Lamott, author of Bird by Bird, on Jane Futcher's Dream Lover. ***Jane Futcher is the author of Crush, Promise Not to Tell, Dream Lover, Marin: The Place, The People, and Women Gone Wild, a memoir about moving to northern Mendocino County, California, where she lives. She grew up in Baltimore, MD.
Most helpful customer reviews
17 of 17 people found the following review helpful.
A Book I Can Well Relate To. . .
By A Customer
(minor semi-spoilers ahead)
Honest without being bitter, sexual without being pornographic, and like a shot of emotion direct to the heart, "Crush" was a very well-written book that was easy to relate to. I'm a gay teenager, and I'm in a small town that reacts to lesbians the same way the people in the boarding school did. When I read Jinx's feelings towards Lexie, I just sat there thinking "My god, that's me with [insert girl's name here]" (even though I doubt [insert girl's name here] would act as cruel and thoughtless as Lexie did).
Any book that can suck me in with its drama rather than make me feel jaded and cause me to feel the same emotions as the leading character is an instant classic on my list. I had to put down the book several times to tell myself that Lexie was fiction and not actually betraying Jinx (and all her readers). But then I remembered the Lexies in my life, and in the lives of millions of other lesbian teenagers. I wish that I could send a copy of this book to all of those "other lesbian teenagers", with a little note inside saying "You are not alone".
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
Could be captioned with "based on a true story"
By A Customer
This book rings so true it made my skin crawl at each turn of the page.The depiction of all characters is outstanding, and bundled together in a way to actually make you feel this is a TRUE story. This innocent, good-at-heart girl, incapable of harming a fly, who will rather cry herself to sleep rather than fight back any injustice, fighting to know herself and find her place in the world... Miggin, the faithful friend, supporting her friend no matter the circumstances... Nicky, Woodie, these adults who help perpetuate the hypocrisy, one more willingly and the other by omission of action... Laura and Maddy, epitomes of rich-girl-that-has-to-have-her-way... And last but obviously not least, Lexie, egotistical to the point of making me want to spit in her face, who will hurt anyone and everyone for the sole purpose of achieving her own goals, capable of sacrifying everyone and everything but herself. She seemed to me the perfect picture of a very dangerous sociopath on the loose, on the first stages of developing and forming a cunning, fox-like personality that --you know it and Jinx says it-- will help her go through to life killing herself on her Jaguar or running over anyone that is innocent enough to cross her path.
This book really impressed me, it's one of the few I've read in this "genre" that doesn't have that "sappy" tendency to make it all right in the end. It rings true, cruelly true.
19 of 23 people found the following review helpful.
A doormat and a psycho
By M. Smith
I've read a lot of GLBT young adult fiction. I wonder why it is that all the lesbian ones are in first person and told from the butchier girl's perspective? Maybe it's some kind of unwritten rule. Right next to the one that says one of the girls should have a funky name, like Battle or Holland. The main protagonist here is named Jinx, and the action takes place at a boarding school for girls in about 1964. An aspiring artist, Jinx becomes infatuated with an unstable girl at her school named Lexie. Jinx is very doormatish, and lets her actions be dictated by Lexie, to the point that she's doing some incredibly stupid things. When she finally gets a backbone and tries to put a stop to it, Lexie does not react well.
The story is interesting, but I frequently wanted to smack Jinx for lusting such a screwed up girl and putting up with her crap. There's at least some hope that she's going to start sticking up for herself more in the future, but I can't budge the feeling that, if this book had continued into Jinx's later life, we'd find that she'd done what was expected of a girl in that time period, and given up her artistic dreams to find herself a nice husband.
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